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Cults: Please Worship Responsibly

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Cults: Please Worship Responsibly Generator · 4 tables
Leader: The cults leader is... Inside Cults: Please Worship Responsibly table · 16 entries
  1. A ruthless killer.
  2. A bard who was just trying to cover for having slept with the governor's wife and ended up way too deep in his own web of lies.
  3. A talking sheep.
  4. A child
  5. An awakened tree
  6. A child soon to be a vessel.
  7. An unwilling ascetic
  8. Also the leader of a respectable church.
  9. The cult founder's great grandchild, who inherited leadership.
  10. A true believer.
  11. A complete madman.
  12. The governor or headman of a town
  13. A inquisitor or witch hunter, from another church
  14. A failed Lore Bard who decided that recording history was boring, and the real money was in convincing schmucks to join their cult.
  15. A soldier who survived taking a crossbow bolt through their head, but woke up afterwards with a completely different personality.
  16. A bard that is right where he wants to be and has a history of procreating with anything and everything without protection.
Rules: The cult’s members must follow a strict rule regarding... Inside Cults: Please Worship Responsibly d12 table · 12 entries
  1. Going out at night alone.
  2. Styling one’s hair.
  3. No using the words "the", "a", or "an."
  4. Eye contact must be made for a count of 5 before you can avert your gaze.
  5. Revealing the true name of their leader
  6. Underwear is not allowed.
  7. Are only allowed to eat one type of food
  8. Who they may speak to.
  9. Speak in rhyme all the time.
  10. Never mention the leader.
  11. Only wear red - clothes, makeup, jewelry, tattoos. Only red.
  12. Dressing one’s self for day-to-day activities.
Rituals: The cult's practices involve... Inside Cults: Please Worship Responsibly table · 13 entries
  1. Literal leaps of faith.
  2. Offerings of strands of their own hair adorned with beads and tossed down into a dark abyss.
  3. Devoting days on end to writing poetry about the joys of being in the cult.
  4. "Confession" practices that resemble intense interrogations.
  5. Wedding ceremonies to marry each member to the leader
  6. Murder of enemy cultists
  7. The cult often indulges in intoxicating substances while listening to music written by the creator
  8. Burnt Offerings of nonbelievers.
  9. Immortality through procreation
  10. All interactions begin and end with washing each other's feet.
  11. Offerings of gold, gems, and valuables.
  12. Tatoos to represent place in society
  13. Group Primal Scream Therapy (the leader started it to try to get the cult to chill out, but the cult members don't know that. They think they are 'praying' to their deity.)
Reverence: The cultists revere... Inside Cults: Please Worship Responsibly d12 table · 12 entries
  1. The cult’s own mortal leader.
  2. A dead god or undead being.
  3. Feet.
  4. Strength
  5. The dark abyss.
  6. A disembodied ideal
  7. An untouched wild location, like a deep grove or hidden pool
  8. A nature/element spirit of some kind
  9. An extreme caricature of femininity and/or masculinity.
  10. A very normal looking rock.
  11. The cult worships their 'God Of Agony', believing them to be the arbiter of life and death, choosing who may enter the world screaming or leave it screaming. Their "god" is, in truth, a corpse with a banshee bound in it - the 'leader' was about to be killed by the banshee and to save his skin he sealed it in the nearest available 'object', that of the banshees last victim.
  12. Two opposing ideals.